Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Lou Ouija's Restaurant

Sometimes... I feel like I can see the future. Building on my knowledge of the now, I see clearly the winding trails of possibility and fill in any gaps with my imagination.

Others though, see the future through the eyes of ghosts and spirits. This is for them.

People love theme restaurants. Even restaurants without blatant gimicky themes like Hooters, TGI Friday's, or Hard Rock Cafe still have themes. Sometimes the theme is as simple as the type of food. Indian, Ethiopian, or German, people go to restaurants wanting an experience.

Lou Ouija's would be a paranormal themed Mediterranean/Eastern European fusion restaurant, dimly lit and decorated like an opium den mixed with a gypsy camp and a Victorian library, curtains and tapestries, dark wood, and private booths enclosed in tents. The waiters and waitresses would be dressed like sexy gypsies. Most importantly, the tables would look like Ouija boards and customers, being guided by their server/medium, would choose what they want to eat using a Ouiji planchette or pointer.



The tables would either have the menu items on it or just a set of numbers that would correspond to various dishes, so that patrons would choose blindly. I know that the cartoon character I used for the graphic does not scream upscale, but I have to get your attention somehow. This would be a very upscale place.

Over 75% of the population of the United States believes in the paranormal in one form or another. Haunted houses, haunted attractions, psychic 900 numbers, Tarot card readers, and countless numbers of TV shows and movies tap into this bottomless market year after year without falter. Plus, Ouija boards are still popular, even among men with "bacne."

Let's talk marketing.

Sure there will be people not so happy about an occult restaurant opening in their neighborhood, but this is the best part of this idea. With Lou Ouija's, you will be opening a restaurant that will possibly get national news coverage right off the bat when some overly zealous christian group announces a boycott of it. Sure, you deny any and all satanic connections publicly, but you circulate rumors that the head chef was born to a woman with thirteen toes, and you have a destination restaurant built overnight! Open several locations around the world, always in cities, and always near sites of tragedies...

When you make a million dollars off this idea, please send me some money... or you might end up being haunted by my ghost. You wouldn't want that now would you?

P.S. Subscribing to Ideas By Chuck is easier than contacting the dead. Click Here.

P.P.S. If you want to read a paranormal, erotic, mystery, thriller, comedy about Anna Nicole Smith's Ghost, click here.

P.P.P.S. I am still on Twitter. @ideasbychuck

P.P.P.P.S. If you see me in your living room, it's because I am a Hollywood Actor now, not because I am a ghost.

6 comments:

Adam said...

Sir, I have to tell you, I have been having an absolutely horrible past couple of days. So I signed into Blogger like an angry thirteen year old ready to whine and vent and rant. Then, I saw the title to this post, along with that picture, at the top of my reading list. I lost it. I laughed for a solid ten minutes with tears streaming out of my eyes. Don't get me wrong, I'm kinda pissed at you because my stomach is killing me. But I was in a serious funk only ten minutes ago, something even my best friends can't pull me out of most of the time, but this post just did that. Suddenly my problems don't seem as severe. And for this little bit of relief from the stress in my life, I thank you. You are amazing.

chuck freak said...

I think most of the ideasbychuck ideas are good and I have kicked myself more than once for getting beaten to the chase but I just had one question? have you gotten paid yet...

Adam said...

@chuck freak- Unfortunately I don't have the money for a pack of cigarettes right now, let alone the kind of scratch it would take to open a fancy gypsy-themed restaurant.

Charles McCarthy said...

Adam,

Thanks, you just made my day.

Chuck Freak,

I haven't. Do you have any money to pay me?

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