Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Hoarders Billionaire Edition


Our country, nay... our world is in financial turmoil, and guess who has been thinking about this problem. Yeah, me, Chuck McCarthy.

I don't have all the answers, but I do think I have come up with an idea that could help all of us out, and it is very simple.

Most of us think of billionaires as being more fortunate than the rest of us, but have you ever stopped to wonder why all these super rich people have such giant houses? Have so many giant houses?

They have giant houses, because giant houses have giant garages.

These super rich people are suffering from a terrible and debilitating disease... Many, if not all, of these super rich people are compulsive hoarders suffering from disposophobia. The houses, the boats, the cars, the diamonds, the shoes, the gold nuggets, the sports teams, the Faberge eggs, the paintings, the sculptures, the copies of the constitution, and even the billions of dollars they have in the bank are all signifiers of their inability to let go of things.

It is only because these people have maids, managers, housekeepers, butlers to keep all their crap in order and the ability to buy or build larger and larger houses, that they are able to hide the illness from everyone.




What the world needs is Hoarders Billionaire Edition to help all the billionaires in the world with their compulsive hoarding.

Only one or two of you might have the TV production chops to make this happen, but this idea can help everyone, for it is my belief that if all of these billionaires are cured, trickle down economics will actually work.

Beyond helping everyone in the world by helping these billionaires get rid of millions of dollars of things they don't need, cleaning out billions from cluttered bank accounts, and helping free up capitol that the rest of the world might actually need, this show could be the start of making you into a super rich person.

Think about it. This show would basically be a cross between Hoarders (super popular) and Cribs (super popular) and Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous (super popular and fabulous).

You don't have to be as smart as Soulja Boy to know this is a good idea. People love to see how super rich people live just as much as the love seeing rats living in someone's living room and hundreds of boxes of light bulbs stacked in the bathroom of a two bedroom Brooklyn apartment.

This show will be a hit!

Do it, and please, if you become super rich because of this, send me some of that money, or encourage billionaires you have on the show to send me some of the money they are trying to get rid of.


P.S. I am on Twitter still: @ideasbychuck

P.P.S. I am still Hollywood Acting. If you want to be my Hollywood agent, go here.

P.P.P.S. Let me know if you have any want to be my personal historian.

P.P.P.P.S. Dear Billionaires, Don't let Imelda Marcos take the fall for you all. You know you have a problem too. The first step is admitting you have a problem.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Murder Murder She Wrote

Some of you may have started to wonder if I have been murdered. Well, I haven't been murdered. If I had been murdered, I wouldn't be able to write this.

Sadly, I have become caught up in being a Hollywood Actor, and as a Hollywood Actor, thinking too much can really get in the way, especially when the Hollywood Acting job is to lay in a bed and drool.

Sometimes, I do imagine being murdered though. I don't know anyone who doesn't have these thoughts. I just hope that my friends are clever enough to kill me cleverly, so that the only way they could possibly be caught is if say... an old woman who writes crime novels stumbled into my life just before my killer or killers carried out their plan.

Fine! You didn't come here to hear my musings about my own murder (lots of alliteration in that). You came here to get an idea that might make you a millionaire, and here it is.

I have been watching a bunch of murder mystery movies and TV shows etc. and I started wondering what would happen in each case if the murderer didn't just confess at the end, and even when they do confess if that confession would actually be admissible as evidence. Basically, would these murderers actually be convicted in a court of law.

People love court cases... as long as they are not asked to be on the jury or involved in any sort of way that would actually affect them. That's why Nancy Grace has a career. That's why there are dozens of Law & Order shows. That's why Matlock was the man. That's why we have F'N Court TV, or as some people call it, "The House That OJ Built."

Murder Murder She Wrote would be Mystery Science Theater 3000 meets Murder She Wrote meets Court TV. Two lawyers give color commentary and arguments for and against the murderer, arguing as to whether or not they believe the murderer would be convicted based on things like admissibility of evidence, confessions, and witness testimony. Would the jury be sympathetic? Etc. etc. etc...

Of course one of the lawyers would be a hot chick with a bitchy face and the other would be a flamboyantly gay man with more tenacity and sass than Jessica Fletcher herself.

People love Murder She Wrote. People love legal arguments... again as long as they aren't actually involved. Plus, this show would cost almost nothing to produce. You need a green screen, two lawyers, a camera, an editor, and the rights to Murder She Wrote, which is probably almost in the public domain by now. Did I mention that one of the lawyers is a hot chick with a bitchy face, and people love that! Shows get sold based completely on the weight that a hot bitchy face carries.

You can make this a hit show. You can make money off of it. You can send me some of that money. Please?

P.S. I am still on Twitter -@ideasbychuck

P.P.S. I still have another website - ChuckMcCarthy.com

P.P.P.S. I still need money.