Boy Meets Blogger

I am sure that all of you, my millions of fans, will remember that a while back I had an idea for a reality show staring me. Well, yeah, I know I have tons of ideas, so if you don't remember, you can click here.

Unfortunately for the viewing public, and all those would be reality show moguls nothing has come of this idea...yet.

But, since I let that idea float out into the world, like a Scooby Doo shaped mylar balloon spiraling to the heavens, I have been in contact with a bloggirl (that's pronounced blog-girl not blo-girl) named Molly McAleer or Molls. If you have been paying attention, you know she interviewed me for her web show, The Molls Show.

Now, I never met Kurt Vonnegut, but I can't imagine him not accusing me of having a brain to big for my own good. Thoughts started to swirl through my brain, thought of some sort of show about me and Molly hitting the mean streets of Hollywood like Laverne and Shirley, trying to make it our way, but in Hollywood, not Milwaukee. Well, these thoughts just kept swirling around in my brain until I finally told Molly about them...

YOU GUYS GOT LUCKY! She liked the idea, and together we came up with this:

Title: Boy Meets Blogger
Genre: Reality
Logline: The Hills meets Real World: Season 1 meets the Internet.

Back Story:

Molly McAleer and I were brought together by a plot line ripped from the pages of a terrible romantic comedy script.

Molly saw a flier for my website IdeasByChuck.com, took a picture of it, and made fun of me for it on her blog MollsSheWrote. She said that I was clearly just some guy trying to get a book deal by using budget fliers with quaint hand-drawn illustrations. My friend Mack saw her post and sent it to me along with this message, "This girl saw your ad. She is famous on the internet."


I found Molly on Twitter, and asked her if she had even looked at my website. She hadn't, so I bugged her until she checked it out.

When she finally really read my site and discovered that I am pretty famous on the internet too, she asked to interview me for her web show. I said yes, and made her a $5000 tshirt to show that there were no hard feelings.

We finally met in real life, hit it off, and discovered that we had a lot in common... way too much in common...


Synopsis:

Boy Meets Blogger would be about internet personalities, Chuck McCarthy and Molly McAleer teaming up to create new, high concept blogs (think stuffwhitepeoplelike.com) and other internet projects in an attempt to land a book deal or something even bigger...

Research for these new blogs would take them from the mean streets of LA to Hollywood clubs, dive bars, and car parks and everywhere in between, while revealing the day to day drama of their lives that will whip audiences into a frenzy of speculation over their relationship... Is there something more than friendship there?


Yeah? Yeah? Yeah, I know, pure gold right? This show has the two things that people are looking for these days, web ties and awesomeness.

Take this idea and run with it! Make it happen! If you need something to pass around to get people excited about this, you can send them BoyMeetsBlogger.com.

P.S. Subscribe to ideas by chuck before there are too many people on the internet and we stop letting people in.

P.P.S. Go Go Lucky Pants! You know what I am talking about.

P.P.P.S. Have you checked out decepticondoms.com?

P.P.P.P.S. I am on twitter now. @ideasbychuck. I promise that even my inane chatter is still fairly amusing.

America's Goth Talent

Do you feel as if the spirit of Amalasuntha has forsaken you? Well, you aren't the only one. But thy luck is bound to change before the feast of the Beltane, if you are able to sell NBC on my new show idea: America's Goth Talent.

Sure, you might think that there are enough talent shows on TV right now what with American Idol, America's Got Talent, Dancing With The Stars, America's Next Top Model, Project Runway, So You Think You Can Dance, Top Chef, Who Wants To Be A Super Hero, and many others already on the air, but you would be wrong (sorry). None of these talent shows showcase talents such as ritualistic mutilation, suicide poetry, channeling demons, or endurance crying. There would be some crossover acts such as contortionists, sword swallowers, and flame jugglers, but really this would be the only place for many talented youngsters to shine, in a dark and brooding way of course.

I am not going to pretend that there haven't been shows before that have given us a glimpse into this world. Ripley's Believe It Or Not! hosted by Dean Cane definitely shined a sallow light into the dark underworlds of the goth subculture, but the it lacked the elements of competition and soul raping that the other competition shows reap and sow with every waning moon. Plus, Dean Cane, though a nice guy I am sure, came off as irrelevant, disconnected, and douchey as the host. I guess there was supposed to be a juxtaposition between Mr. Perfect and the freak-show, but it always just struck me as awkward.

I would tap Jim Rose to host the show. He has a little bit of experience with this kind of thing, and I think he can juggle.

One selling point that you can use when approaching NBC is the fact that they can use the same set and judges for America's Goth Talent as America's Got Talent. All they have to do is put some fake cobwebs up and use more spot lighting. David Hasselhoff already kind of looks like an old elven woman, the other guy has the British accent that all goth kids wish they had, and Sharon Osbourne is already practically a goth goddess.

Advertisers and sponsors would include the surgical stainless steal industry, leather, any cosmetic companies who sell cheap black eyeliner, gothic teddy bear manufacturers, colored contact manufacturers, fang manufacturers, and journal makers.

P.S. Subscribe to ideas by chuck, or I will send the demons of hell after you. Just kidding... or am I?

P.P.S. If you want to hear about the most boring and inane moments of my life, click here.

P.P.P.S. Marilyn Manson's song The Dope Show would be the perfect theme song for the show. Not just because Marilyn Manson is a major goth icon, but because it is one of his only songs that I have ever been able to listen to all the way through, and it is actually pretty catchy.

Ideas By Chuck Reality Show

This one kind of speaks for its self, but I will expound.

Picture this: "MythBusters" meets "The Apprentice" meets "I'm With Busey," but more interesting and sexy.

Cameras would follow me around through my depressing yet interesting daily life, while a team of producers, lawyers, businessmen, and scientists are hard at work trying to make money off of my ideas. It's a juxtaposition kind of thing.

I wouldn't get any real cash from the show unless one or more of my ideas proves to be lucrative. This is probably leading some of you to think that if the show is a hit, I should get some money since it was my idea in the first place. True, but I would make an exception for the actual show, though I do want a creator credit.

What makes me think that my life is interesting enough to carry a reality show?

Well, I live in Hollywood, which seems to be where most reality shows take place. I might not be Paris Hilton, but I have seen her limo, and I know where Club Hyde is. Yep, I live in Hollywood, so you can check that off your list. Hollywood: Check!

I work on TV shows and commercials and write and produce my own internet shows and commercials, and I could name about a dozen shows on TV right now that are about either TV shows or advertising agencies (if any producers of Mad Men are watching, I look good in bell bottoms and could have the most amazing mustache for a guest spot on Mad Men). Interesting job: Check!

I am an artist. I draw, paint, and write music. More importantly, people buy my art and love my music... love it... love. Superstar artist: Check!

I have interesting friends. Sure, everyone thinks that they have interesting friends, but do you have friends who have started a new carnocentric holiday season? Do you have friends who destroy the morning show circuits with awesomecore like my old band mates the Attractive Eighties Women? Do you have friends who have built their own villages, done photo shoots with America's Next Top Model winners, or travel the world just trying to have sex with women? Well, I do have these friends. I don't know why I have any friends at all, but I do, and they are pretty interesting and so hawt! Hawt friends: Double Check!

I even have my own clothing line, drawnika. Check it out at drawnika.com. You are pretty much a loser out here in Hollywood if you don't have your own clothing line. Clothing line: Check!

Sorry for tooting my own horn, but if you aren't going to toot your own horn, what is the point of having your own reality show? Right?

Toots own horn: Check! Check! Check!

Pluses for the producers:

1. I already have a pretty strong web presence and a good amount of content built up.

2. Any products that I have invented will get advertising before they even hit the market, and fans of the show will want to support my ideas, that is if they like me.

3. Picking a guy out of obscurity is sensational, and the show will definitely get some pretty good free publicity. Plus, there are sure to be bloggers going nuts either with praise or hatred for a fellow blogger plucked from the crowd.

4. My ideas are good.

5. Women and gay men ages 45-60 love me.

If you don't jump on this, you will be asked to leave the tribe (that was a reference to Survivor and not Judaism).


P.S. Subscribe to my blog. The more people that subscribe, the more subscribers I will have.

P.P.S. Floss daily.

Cart Cowboys

I am sorry if any of you, my billions of loyal readers, thought that I had run out of ideas, or that something terrible had happened to me.

Have no fear. I was just taking a little Labor Day break to revel in the Frankenstein's Feelings breakthrough.

I am back with a great idea for any of you aspiring documentary filmmakers or reality TV bandits.

The idea: Cart Cowboys, a documentary/reality show about the men that lay their lives on the line to keep shopping carts in the parking lot of your local super market.

Many of you may not be familiar with the wandering shopping cart, but in my neighborhood they are all over the place, and stray carts have been multiplying in number as gas prices rise.

Sometimes they are befriended and taken care of by homeless people, but many time they are just left abandoned by the side of the road.

Luckily there are men out there, cowboys in their own right, who ride our streets and bring the stray carts back to the fold.

They are cowboys alright, cart cowboys, and I want to hear their story, so get out there and make a riveting documentary or a tacky Cops style reality show about these brave men.



FUN FACT: Shopping carts cost around $150.00 retail.

If someone can make a documentary entirely about a font, I am sure you can make a compelling and interesting documentary about Mexican guys who drive around in beat up trucks collecting shopping carts, fighting homeless, and dealing with the new technologies of an ever changing world (i.e. magnetic cart break anti-theft systems).

P.S. Subscribing to Ideas By Chuck might make you feel better about the world.

P.P.S. Click here to check out a Public Radio article about me.

P.P.S. Telling your friends about Ideas By Chuck will make them think that you don't just look up pornography on the internet.

Bucket List The TV Show

I haven't seen "The Bucket List," starring Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman, nor do I want to see it. I almost needed a bucket to throw up in after seeing the trailer.

I appreciate both actors. Morgan Freeman is one of the only people in the world who can convincingly pull off a braided leather belt and jeans, and I don't think I need to make up any excuses for liking Jack Nicholson.

This might sound a little "Andy Rooney," but, I don't want to see two actors portray characters going around doing things that they wanted to do before dying, especially not actors that I know have done or will get to do everything that they could ever want.

But, what I would like to see is real old people doing crazy things that they wanted to do before they "kick the bucket."

Each episode a group of senior citizens would get a chance to live out one of their life long desires, like sky diving, riding horses on the beach, visiting Mt. Kilimanjaro, meeting the President, and other things old people want to do.

If you wanted to make it a little more dramatic, you could choose 5 people who wanted to go sky diving, and 5 people who wanted to read poetry in front of an audience, and make all 10 of them do both things.

The people who aren't scared of jumping out of a plane might be scared to get up in front of an audience, and the other way around.

If you wanted to make it really crazy dramatic, you could take 10 people, each one with a different experience that they wanted to have before "kicking the bucket," and make them all do all 10 things.

You get the right group of crotchety yet lovable old people traveling the world and fighting over who gets the arm rest, and you my friend, will have a hit show. People love old people, and they are great for reality TV because they will say anything, have strong opinions, and many times have no purpose in life, just like every single person that has ever been on the Real World since Season 3.

If you are pitching this and someone says, "No one wants to watch a bunch of old people," hit these points:

1. Golden girls - HIT Show!
2. Rudy from Season 1 of Survivor - HIT Show!
3. Andy Rooney - HIT Show!
4. Talk Sex with Sue Johansen - HIT Show!
5. Larry King Live - Hit Show!

I think Bam Margera would make the best host for this. He has proven himself as a host, he has mass appeal, and he is good with old people.

People love old people! You love your grandma don't you? Get out there and pitch or produce a TV show that she will love! Maybe she will stop asking what happened to "Murder She Wrote."

P.S. The old Ideas By Chuck are just as good as the new Ideas By Chuck. If you are new here, you should go check out my past ideas. You can't know where you are going, if you don't know where you are coming from.

P.P.S. Subscribing to Ideas By Chuck will make you feel good.

P.P.P.S. I didn't say Bam Margera should be the host just because I found that picture.

Pumping Hearts

Dating shows are very popular. Everyone can get caught up in the frenzy of an episode of MTV's "Next," every episode trashier than the "Next." The key is a finding a new angle to approach love, dating, and the human condition, to serve up the anticipation and drama of a first encounter on a fancy new serving dish.

Guess what I have for you.

Guess.

Yeah, a fancy new serving dish - dating at the gym.

I would call the show "Pumping Hearts."

Three guys and three girls would be guided through new work out routines, being paired up and split up by the host, a charismatic personal trainer - Greg and Susie on the stairmasters! Trip and Heather doing crunches! Patric and Channel stretching! NOW Switch! You get the idea.

Of course there would be one on one interviews at the water cooler.

Each show would consist of two sets of guys and girls. In the first segment, the girls would compete in a physical challenge to see who gets to pick a partner first, second, and third. In the second segment, the guys would compete.

Finally, all the couples would compete against each other in a physical challenge. The winners get a dream vacation.

Wrap up interviews.

The thing to really push when you are pitching this to your bosses at powerful reality show production companies is the fact that there can be tons of product placement, such as new exercise machines, sports drinks, apparel, supplements and the likes. There could even be guest instructors plugging books and DVDs for aerobics, palates, yoga, or any other new workout craze such as pole dancing.

You can get this going! And...Get it going! Get it going! Lift! Lift! Lift!

And...

Grapevine! Grapevine! Grapevine!

P.S. Subscribing to IdeasByChuck.com can make your life awesome.

P.P.S. I was on the radio recently talking to radio personality Luke Burbank about some of my ideas. You can check out the podcast here or if that doesn't work out for some reason, you can go to TBTL.net