Bucket List The TV Show

I haven't seen "The Bucket List," starring Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman, nor do I want to see it. I almost needed a bucket to throw up in after seeing the trailer.

I appreciate both actors. Morgan Freeman is one of the only people in the world who can convincingly pull off a braided leather belt and jeans, and I don't think I need to make up any excuses for liking Jack Nicholson.

This might sound a little "Andy Rooney," but, I don't want to see two actors portray characters going around doing things that they wanted to do before dying, especially not actors that I know have done or will get to do everything that they could ever want.

But, what I would like to see is real old people doing crazy things that they wanted to do before they "kick the bucket."

Each episode a group of senior citizens would get a chance to live out one of their life long desires, like sky diving, riding horses on the beach, visiting Mt. Kilimanjaro, meeting the President, and other things old people want to do.

If you wanted to make it a little more dramatic, you could choose 5 people who wanted to go sky diving, and 5 people who wanted to read poetry in front of an audience, and make all 10 of them do both things.

The people who aren't scared of jumping out of a plane might be scared to get up in front of an audience, and the other way around.

If you wanted to make it really crazy dramatic, you could take 10 people, each one with a different experience that they wanted to have before "kicking the bucket," and make them all do all 10 things.

You get the right group of crotchety yet lovable old people traveling the world and fighting over who gets the arm rest, and you my friend, will have a hit show. People love old people, and they are great for reality TV because they will say anything, have strong opinions, and many times have no purpose in life, just like every single person that has ever been on the Real World since Season 3.

If you are pitching this and someone says, "No one wants to watch a bunch of old people," hit these points:

1. Golden girls - HIT Show!
2. Rudy from Season 1 of Survivor - HIT Show!
3. Andy Rooney - HIT Show!
4. Talk Sex with Sue Johansen - HIT Show!
5. Larry King Live - Hit Show!

I think Bam Margera would make the best host for this. He has proven himself as a host, he has mass appeal, and he is good with old people.

People love old people! You love your grandma don't you? Get out there and pitch or produce a TV show that she will love! Maybe she will stop asking what happened to "Murder She Wrote."

P.S. The old Ideas By Chuck are just as good as the new Ideas By Chuck. If you are new here, you should go check out my past ideas. You can't know where you are going, if you don't know where you are coming from.

P.P.S. Subscribing to Ideas By Chuck will make you feel good.

P.P.P.S. I didn't say Bam Margera should be the host just because I found that picture.

Seductive Slot Machine

Who plays the slots? Old women play the slots.

For some reason I was recently talking to a friend of mine about slot machines, because for some reason, I have several friends involved in the "gaming industry."

What did I come up with?

A slot machine with a built in foot massager. The massager would keep going as long as you are playing the one armed bandit. Maybe you could even call the slot machine, "Foot Loose," to tie the whole thing together.

If you are in the "gaming industry," I dare you not to use this idea!



A Golden Girls themed slot machine might do well too.

Golden Girls Reunion Special

I know Sophia (Estelle Getty) has dementia and is no longer acting, but what better setting for a reunion show than a funeral.

Dorothy, Rose, and Blanche come together one last time at Sophia's funeral. Closed casket. She was hit by a bus.

The girls talk about their lives. Drama between children and grandchildren leads to wake and funeral hijinx. Rose says something about using marbles instead of quarters to weigh down the dead persons eyelids in St. Olaf. Blanche has sex with the minister, who, by the way, drives a Porche. Dorothy looks on disapprovingly. The will is read. Sophia asks for her ashes to be spread over her native Sicily, sending the girls on a Mediterranean cruise.

On the cruise, Dorothy is seasick, Rose finds new uses for life jackets, and Blanche has sex with the Captain, who, by the way, drives a Ferrari. There is obviously extreme potential for a Golden Girls/Love Boat crossover at this point. I think that a cameo by Ted Lange, a.k.a. Isaac the bartender is inevitable.

The girls rediscover their friendship and have some laughs along the way. They spread Sophia's ashes and hug, bathed in a deep red glow of the setting sun.