Thursday, July 17, 2008
I think it is time for an AbFab movie.
What the hell is AbFab?
AbFab or Absolutely Fabulous was a BBC sitcom that has a global cult following of awkward high school drama girls, and gay men. I went through an awkward high school drama girl phase, so I have seen most of the episodes even though I am a straight man.
Why make a movie?
Slutty middle aged women and alcoholic mothers are so in right now. Just look at Britney Spears and "Sex and the City." And Patsy and Edwina were the original martini guzzling women of the small screen. Plus, all those high school drama girls and gay men, even though they are all grown up now, still crave more AbFab.
Lucky for you millions of writers out there who read my blog for inspiration and ideas, I have written a synopsis for the movie. Here it is.
Logline: Patsy and Edwina go to Hollywood.
Synopsis: Patsy and Edwina are lost at sea when the cruise ship they were on sinks. Saffy, Edwina's daughter, takes the money from a sizable life insurance policies that she had taken out on her mother and Patsy, and moves to Hollywood to pursue a career as a screen writer.
Five years later Saffy is riding high in Hollywood. One of her screen plays, "Summer's Song: Winters Poem," has been produced and received critical and box office success. Based on that success Merchant/Ivory is producing her next script, "Remnants of Endlessness," with an all star cast.
The day before "Remnants of Endlessness," is to begin shooting, Patsy and Edwina show up on Saffy's doorstep. They were never on the cruise ship. In a drunken haze they had boarded a Greek oil barge that was subsequently attacked by pirates. They spent the previous five years as opium addicted sex slaves on a Cambodian pirate ship, which neither of them seem too upset about.
Saffy is happy to see her mother for about a split second before they start destroying her life.
Patsy and Edwina insist on parts in her film and run a muck in Hollywood seemingly destroying Saffy's movie and career.
Luckily, everything works out fine in the end with Saffy's movie, but she ends up in her own personal hell, as Patsy and Edwina have gotten so much paparazzi attention that VH1 gives them their own reality show.
Get out there and write the script before someone else does. We need some new and better rehashing of British TV. Even though the last fifteen minutes of "Mr. Bean's Holiday," are amazing, we need something better, something drunker, something AbFab.
P.S. Subscribing to my blog cures the common cold.