Friday, April 10, 2009

Bonjour Date Night

Online dating is booming. Booming. People are looking to the silicon circuits to get their hands on some silicon circles, if you know what I mean.

Sure online dating is convenient and cheaper than regular dating, or going to a bar or church to try to pick up chicks. You don't have to pay for gas, food, or drinks (that church wine isn't really free). You have a certain amount of anonymity and safety. Plus, you don't have to feign interest in the arts or belief in god. You just have to have a nice picture of yourself and learn how to type "LOL" without thinking.

This is of course also the problem with online dating, misrepresentation. People use pictures of themselves from 10th grade or the last time they had a full head of hair and didn't have a double chin, and if the picture is recent there are a host of different techniques that people have quickly mastered to make themselves look better, from only posting pictures taken from more than fifteen feet away, to the always effective "Myspace angles." Moreover, don't every forget about Photoshop. With Photoshop I could make myself look like a Jewish Mel Gibson if I wanted to.

What if you could have the best of both worlds? What if there was a dating service that would let you talk to and choose who you wanted to talk to and meet through your computer, while at the same time being able to see them in person? Wouldn't you be interested in that? Don't you think other people would like that too?

Here is the idea: a bonjour dating night.

If you have a Mac, Bonjour is a program that you have on your computer ( Mac or PC is one of the eHarmony 29 levels of compatibility). Bonjour is part of the iChat program. Basically, when you log into it, it allows you to see and talk to anyone who is using the same wireless network as you and signed into Bonjour. It is a pretty nifty tool for file sharing etc. Even if you don't like this idea, you just learned something.

Basically, you would have a night at a coffee shop or somewhere like that with free WIFI. All the singles interested in participating would log onto Bonjour and chat away. If you meet someone you like talking to enough, someone you are interested in, they are sitting right there. They can tell you where they are, or you can tell them where you are. If you like each other enough, you can talk in person. They are right there, so there can be no misrepresentation, at least as far as appearance is concerned ( this does not take into account any whigs, pushup bras, or fake noses ).

Moreover, the singles participating are most likely from around the area, so you don't end up in a long distance relationship with a French model, or being asked to go sailing in the Adriatic as a first date by a Greek dignitary. In the very least you could meet some people from your neighborhood ( smart, cool people with Macs ).

P.S. Subscribing to Ideas By Chuck is hip and cool. I heard that Don Johnson was a subscriber. You want to be like Don Johnson? Subscribe.

P.P.S. Monique, if you are reading this, I still miss you. If you ever get your green card for modeling, please let me know.

P.P.P.S. I am thinking of giving up freelance thinking, so if you own a think tank and have any openings, let me know.


Anonymous said...

this is a decent idea but here is how to turn it into a money maker

These ladies of the night or mid afternoon that chat up patrons on Bonjour and suggest a quicky in the bathroom....
The bathroom of the establishment has a condom machine that only takes credit cards and the condoms cost $100 a piece. $100 a PIECE. ha!

if the BonJohn has a condom on him the BonWhour says something like "i don't trust anything that's been in a velcrow wallet pressed up againt your Best Buy card for months" and insists on a spankin' new on out of the machine.

i know this idea has tons of problems but we all have our problems. I still like it.

Anonymous said...

also a good Bon-whour can read a BonJohn

She has techniques in accidentally breaking condoms in the throws so a new one must be bought and knows who this will and wont work on.

she has signals with the counter girls at the coffee shop that tell them when to come and pound on the door.

she knows which BonJohns will walk away out of embarrassment if interrupted

Anonymous said...


Charles McCarthy said...

Hmmm. I have to say that you are definitely thinking in and out and in and out and in and out of the box.

Unknown said...

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.....ha ha ha ha.........

Anonymous said...

It already exists...

Anonymous said...

Here's an idea... I got this idea because I saw an oil change location that was for rent, and a few blocks back, I was stuck at a stop light that had a Hooters at the intersection. Oil Change + Hooters = Raging Hard Quick Lube (lol). Hire bikini-topped women to work at the oil change location. Put up a glass window in the waiting area that goes the whole length of the room so you can see them in action. Blast "girls girls girls" by Motley Crew, that new NickelBack song "Something in Your Mouth", and other strip club songs. And even sell "Oil Girl" calendars, etc. :)

Charles McCarthy said...

That is close, the site, but not quite the same.

The idea is less of a service than it is a promotional thing to get people at your coffee shop buying coffee etc.

Also, to the handjoblubejob idea:

I am a fan of girls in bikinis covered in oil.